I'm going to be honest here. I have no idea what New Jersey really did differently last night. But it must have been something. They blew out Anaheim 6-3.
It seems like both teams really wanted the win, so both teams compromised their defenses. Anaheim goalie Jean-Sebastien Giguere gave up a lot of rebounds. And his defensemen seemed to be constantly in the corners instead of in front of him. Maybe they dropped some change there?
The game was bittersweet. Lots of great scoring. Lots of great saves. Lots of great goaltending — more than the score indicates. But it just served to remind us how boring the first four games of the series were, and how boring the playoffs and regular season have been in general. There's just not enough anger and desperation in the game. And Thursday's game showed that that's what hockey runs on.

Want a safe job?
Pillow inspector is probably pretty good.
Professional napper probably is, too.
And any job where you work in the fetal position will probably keep you pretty safe.
But what's the safest of all?
Running the Rangers or Islanders. Or any New York team, really. Because while the coaches may come and go, the GMs seem to last forever. A GM really can't be bad enough to get fired here. In fact, it's our new slogan. We're dumping that whole I Love New York thing and changing it to "Run Your Team Into the Ground. It's OK. You're Safe Here."
Catchy, no?

Oh yeah. There's another Stanley Cup game Thursday night. Is it me or is nothing at all happening between these games? I keep forgetting the Finals have started.

Seriously. I meant what I said yesterday. No more talk about how to make hockey better. That means you Lou Lamoriello. And the rest of the Devils. And the Ducks. Lamoriello tells the Times that penalties should go the full two minutes — even if a goal is scored. John Madden says to get rid of the center red line. Paul Kariya wants to move the nets back toward the boards. Duck GM Brian Murray says the team on the penalty kill shouldn't be allowed to ice the puck. Chicago GM Mike Smith says playing the trap should be a two-minute penalty. And yes. He's serious.
Me? I think everyone should just play the game as-is. Either that, or make it like Slamball, with lots of trampolines and bouncing and whatnot.

Remember ex-Red Wing goalie Dom Hasek was accused of attacking some guy during an inline hockey game? Well he's been banned from the league for a year. That seems like more of a reward than a punishment to me. Inline hockey? That's like roller disco. And seriously. I think Hasek is ready to return to the NHL. Once you start getting accused of beating up people on roller skates, it's time to go back to work.

Condolences to the writing staff of FoxSports.com — SportsJournalists.com says they were all laid off. Among the casualties is NHL writer Jim Kelley. He always had a lot of good stuff. I didn't link to him as much as I should have because of my crappy dial-up connection. The FoxSports site just didn't run well over phone lines. Hopefully Kelley, and the rest of his colleagues, will land someplace soon. Maybe Kelley will go back to Buffalo. He used to write for the Buffalo News. Maybe he can come work for PuckUpdate. Man that guy knows his hockey.

The Islanders fired coach Peter Laviolette.
You know why?
Because they couldn't fire Alexei Yashin.

Here's a nice story on Bob Gainey, Montreal's new GM. I want to write more, but I've had no time this week. Montreal has made some very, um, unusual choices over the years, though, and I'm sure Gainey will be key in terms of their not blowing money on crappy players for no reason.

Can we go one day without someone suggesting rule changes for the NHL?
We get it. The games are often boring. Goalie equipment is huge. The ice is small. Everyone has their own plan to make the game more exciting. Less men on the ice. Bigger nets. Horses. Dennis Rodman. Enough! Just enjoy the game. It's not perfect, but it's entertaining.
Thank you.

The always awesome SportsByBrooks has a link to Sports Illustrated's look at sports' dullest stars. On the list? Our good friend, Joe Sakic of the Avalanche.
He is kind of dull. But that's good. I'm always scared Dennis Rodman is going to end up in the NHL.
Really scared. It's a phobia, really.

Not to play Tuesday morning quarterback, but just a couple of thoughts after watching the Ducks take down the Devils in overtime of game four:

* Haven't the Devils needed a genuine goal-scorer since Alexander Mogilny left in 2001. And wouldn't a goal-scorer have helped with Anaheim goalie Jean-Sebastien Giguere? I'm all for keeping budgets down, but the Devils have no real go-to scorer. John Madden is a great guy, but deep down he's a grinder. And Joe Nieuwendyk is hurt.

* Haven't the Devils needed a genuine faceoff man since Bobby Holik left last season? If Holik had no other hockey skills he'd still be pretty helpful for faceoffs alone.

* Why is Patrik Elias the only Devil who knows to shoot high on Giguere? I mean I even know that, and I can't skate or shoot.

* Does anybody care about that idiot couple that said they'd get married if the Ducks win the Cup? Trust me. They don't.

* How many on-air people does ABCESPNDISNEYTHEMIGHTYDUCKS have working the finals? I've counted 33. So far.

The Mario Lemieux-leaving-Pittsburgh denials were in full force Monday.
From the Penguins own site:

"In response to recent media speculation about his future as a player, Pittsburgh Penguins owner Mario Lemieux issued the following statement today:
'I am not considering selling my interest in the Pittsburgh Penguins.
'As I said to our season ticket holders last week, I have not decided whether I will play in 2003-04. However, if I do play, it will be for the Pittsburgh Penguins.'"

Ranger GM Glen Sather said he hadn't heard anything about Lemieux coming to Broadway.
And Joe Starkey at the Tribune-Review said he doesn't see Lemieux being able to unload his share of the team on anybody.
And that's the beauty of this rumor. It makes no sense, but it just feels true. It probably isn't, but there's just something truthful about the absurdity of it.

Is this even for real?
New York Post-ie Larry Brooks says Mario Lemieux is ready to dump his interest in the Penguins, become a free agent and possibly join the New York Rangers. He's looking for $10-12 million per year, and according to Brooks, Lemieux says he wants to play three more seasons.
How crazy is that? The Rangers never met a star past his prime that they wouldn't sign to a huge contract did they?
And kudos to Brooks for really working this story. He first reported this scenario back in March.
I feel bad for the people of Pittsburgh. The Penguins have traded away every good player they could. They have nothing cooking for next year. They're not even pretending they do. They're just going to play the trap and hope for the best. And Lemieux might be jerking everyone along. May 29 he told season ticket-holders that he didn't know what his plans for next season are yet. But if Lemieux wants out of Pittsburgh, which he seems to, and he needs to find some idiot to buy his money pit of a team, then he knows his plan. And he's probably known it for a while. It's not the type of thing where he can wake up in October and say "Hmmmm. I think I'd like to play for the Rangers this week. Let's make that happen." I don't begrudge Lemieux for wanting a payday. It sucks that he's leaving the only team he's ever played for, but it's his right. But Pittsburgh has been very good to him. Pittsburgh loves him. He shouldn't lie or hedge when talking to the people that have paid his salary since he first joined the NHL in 1921. He should look them in the eye and say "I want to play next year but not here. I'm sorry."
Lemiuex is supposed to be a class act. And maybe he is, or maybe he will be, depending upon how this all plays out. But so far, it seems pretty crappy. Really crappy. I mean, first I hear a Ramones song in a cell phone commercial and now this? How much is my heart supposed to take today?

I'm glad Devils goalie Martin Brodeur can laugh about the freak goal he gave up to Anaheim. It really wasn't funny at the time, though. ABC cut to a shot of the Ducks bench right after the puck trickled in off of Brodeur's dropped stick and just about every Duck was horrified. No one was smiling. And they were the team who "scored" the goal.
The Ducks won game three of the Finals by a score of 3-2, but the score doesn't reflect how poorly the Ducks fared in terms of capitalizing on chances. Anaheim just couldn't move in for the kill. Paul Kariya appears to be some sort of expert at hitting the shaft of Brodeur's stick. None of the Ducks seems to know how to shoot a puck through traffic. Or through empty ice. The Devils were awful last night. Their defense was positively porous. They only two things keeping the game as close as it was were Brodeur's goaltending and the Ducks apparent fear of combining rubber with mesh.
The Devils tried to sleepwalk to a Stanley Cup and it almost worked. It seems that the only thing that might have woken them up was the sound of a stick hitting the ice and the anguished cries of an upset goaltender. Now let's see if that keeps the Devils awake for game four.

The Blue Jackets signed goalie Freddy Brathwaite to a one-year deal to be Marc Denis' back-up. This season, while the Blues, Brathwaite's old team, were hemorrhaging goalies, the only real constant in net was Brathwaite. The Blues paid back Brathwaite's talent and loyalty by dumping him at the trade deadline to make room for Chris Osgood. And we all know how that Osgood-Brent Johnson tandem worked out for the Blues.
Denis played 77 games for the Blue Jackets this season. I'm hoping Brathwaite will see more than five games worth of action. He's a strong goalie. And good enough to be a number one somewhere. He's not a back-up. I'm not even sure why he's taking the back-up gig. But the Blue Jackets lucked out. They have a great goalie. They just better treat him right.